Parenting Award Of The Year

My daughter and I like to come up with wacky story lines for any and all of her toys. Woody from Toy Story is married to Flower Bunny from Build a Bear, and heads up the “Woody Family.” He had to marry a rabbit, because he is the only male character she owns. Anyway, Flower Bunny decides to divorce Woody, and travel the world. One of their adopted children gets sick, and Dr. Delicia(a 45 year old homemade doll) has to come over to pump her stomach. She had been eating rat poison. While treating the child, a baby falls out from Delicia’s dress onto the floor. The baby is fully clothed, and claims to be Woody and Delicia’s love child. The baby is really a 40 year old hermaphrodite midget with a baby face. The baby wants to steal the 15 trillion dollars worth of gold and silver coins in the basement. She gets busted and serves a day in jail, before being rehabilitated and welcomed into the Woody family. Now, she enjoys her favorite hobby-hair sculpture. She let her eyebrows grow into a unibrow, and got extensions so that they reach around to her chin. She then grew her mustache so long that she ties it into her belly button ring. She even went so far as to have hair transplants put in her eyes! After coming up with this story my daughter and I took a picture of Baby Faced Malone, and did a fine illustration for you all. Should I get the parenting award of the year for our activities, or get a visit from child protective services? You be the judge!

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