Happy Halloween! Wait-what?

It’s not Halloween? It was last week? Rats! Late again! I don’t want to wait another year to show the Headless Crybaby, so here it is-a week late, or fifty-one weeks early…

The-Headless-Crybaby

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Fantastic Fart!

Lately, it seems the writing staff here at Neurotico can only write jokes about toots. Looks like I am going to have to put them back on a straight bread and water diet, and chain them to their desks again! Let them out in the sun for ten minutes a month, and they lose their focus…

Panel 130 Fantastic Fart

 

Parenting Award Of The Year

My daughter and I like to come up with wacky story lines for any and all of her toys. Woody from Toy Story is married to Flower Bunny from Build a Bear, and heads up the “Woody Family.” He had to marry a rabbit, because he is the only male character she owns. Anyway, Flower Bunny decides to divorce Woody, and travel the world. One of their adopted children gets sick, and Dr. Delicia(a 45 year old homemade doll) has to come over to pump her stomach. She had been eating rat poison. While treating the child, a baby falls out from Delicia’s dress onto the floor. The baby is fully clothed, and claims to be Woody and Delicia’s love child. The baby is really a 40 year old hermaphrodite midget with a baby face. The baby wants to steal the 15 trillion dollars worth of gold and silver coins in the basement. She gets busted and serves a day in jail, before being rehabilitated and welcomed into the Woody family. Now, she enjoys her favorite hobby-hair sculpture. She let her eyebrows grow into a unibrow, and got extensions so that they reach around to her chin. She then grew her mustache so long that she ties it into her belly button ring. She even went so far as to have hair transplants put in her eyes! After coming up with this story my daughter and I took a picture of Baby Faced Malone, and did a fine illustration for you all. Should I get the parenting award of the year for our activities, or get a visit from child protective services? You be the judge!

baby faced malone1

Flappy Bird’s Aunt Lana

Glad to finally be back with a new cartoon! Working on site for three weeks has delayed its completion. If anyone knows of a super-rich art patron that loves comics done by smelly, fat, middle aged men, let me know. All this work is putting a crimp in my comic creation!P 129 The Flying Squirrel

Why I Am Not Doing Beautiful Cartoons…

I have several cartoons I really want to draw, but first I must get some work that pays cash money, instead of Scooby Snacks! I am redoing my resume with wacky icons, so that maybe someone will actually read it, when I apply for on-line projects. Now when it is thrown in the trash, it will be tossed with style!

resume icons template 1